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May 9 2021

WHAT ARE THESE WEIRD SYMPTOMS?

So, It’s been about six months since my religious use of my Biocidin, Oregano oil, gut biome liquid,, organic, juicing and the innumerable supplements prescribed by my Mold Illness doctor.. It absolutely makes no sense that no matter how strict…

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Mar 15 2021

YOU ARE BLESSED!

Come Away With Me, My Beloved

Declaration of faith: I declare God’s blessings over my life. I will walk in my God given power and exercise my authority as God invested in me. Today I will function in my…

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Joy in the journey.  I'd always hoped that the road would gently unwind before me as i struggled to ascend to higher heights, while being pushed backwards, by the  continual and daunting symptoms of my many ailments. Just last week, as I was uploading my original songs and past gigs, to this website, i remembered  the anguish and  exhaustion   of supporting myself by delivering telephone books during the  day and  most evenings, I would be performing at the Oakland House, a private  event or a local tavern. My love for composing on the guitar and collaborating on original music with  John DeGrazio and Kyle Hicks saved me from suicidal  thoughts. God always made a way for me to  get fund to produce and record my songs in the studio.  I'll never forget  crying out  to God as I pushed a hand truck loaded with heavy telephone books, wondering why I wasn't touring with my band and respected.   The staggering fatigue from the  Lyme symptoms and  my carbon monoxide poisoning episode made me feel inferior and cursed,  The constant eking out a living wore down my spirits often and i wondered what my destiny was. 

      Angst, disappointment and regret, weighed me down often during my long Dystonia battle. but as I've finally come of age this late in my life, I acquiesce to the reality of Christ being my solid foundation. God's precepts have sheltered me from the sting of hatred, unforgiveness and retaliation. I know that His peace tempers me to have a grateful heart and make the most of every opportunity, however small.  I cherish, Moses' Psalm 90:12.

       Teach us to number our days that we may know wisdom.   

      No need to keep asking  Father God..."why"

       In the past, I often felt ,my creative and musical endeavors were not allowed to bear  the fruit they deserved for whatever reason. i wanted to be successful fashion designer, best selling author, renowned poet or well-loved music icon. too often, my creations had to be postponed indefinitely because of   constant interruptions of lie-threatening illnesses.. Worse yet, fewer and fewer invitations came as people became aware that the TMJ Dystonia symptoms  were diminishing my . I noticed with great anxiety, that my vocal prowess and guitar skill was also strained.  I'd expected  that I'd  get better with age, not worse.

       And so,, I determined in my heart, I would push forward no matter how much it hurt. I could not quit because of what Christ did for me. He destined me to be a conqueror and i was to  be a role model for precious  girls and women whose lives were shattered by trauma. As I scan  the horizon of my future, I'm assured that  He will bring beauty out of the ashes.  Behold, He arose  and redeemed me! 

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