Back to all posts

YOU ARE BLESSED!

Come Away With Me, My Beloved

Declaration of faith: I declare God’s blessings over my life. I will walk in my God given power and exercise my authority as God invested in me. Today I will function in my godly creative ability and my words will bring forth good things to the world around me. Genesis 1:26-28.

So, quieted myself and decided I must make some serious changes because I wasn’t where I wanted to be spiritually and emotional, (walking in joy and abundance). God is never the problem when we stand and survey our landscape and see it is negative. At this crossroad, I knew it was way past due to re-asses my life and invest in some serious soul-searching in a quiet place with God. In Hi quiet presence was where I could find solutions.,. For those of us who’ve been in the valley for a long time, frequent times of re-evaluation are necessary to be able to be consistent and forward moving.

I reconnected with a precious friend and spiritual sister who went through a breast Cancer season and is living with a very abusive and negative roommate. She has been praying and steadily saving for her own place but she share her feelings about the difficulty of being positive and expectant when in a very long season of greet hardship and despair. Her feelings resounded with me and she acknowledged my long season, (14 years) of battling my vicious symptoms,) yet holding fast to God’s promise of .prosperity and good health.

I had another spiritually inspiring conversation with a Christian sister from the Facebook Mold illness group.. She always posted powerful scriptures to encourage us with severe symptoms and depression. Just before we talked, I was listening to an amazing teaching from Pastor Ed Citronelili! I was searching for teachings on identifying and reaking curses on the YouTube channel and his teaching video came up. Halfway into the video he brought out another curse. He said that sometimes we ourselves speaking death by the words we speak.! He gave examples of negative declarations, “I am sick and tired of this or you.” “This_______ is killing me” and “I’m getting worse.” Guilty realization hit me as I thought of some egative statements I spoke aloud, not realizing they were prophetic and ignited depression and/or hopelessness over my spiritual atmosphere.

My Christian sister and I both agreed that we needed to stop saying out loud, “Oh, I feel horrible” or “Oh, I will never get better”. I’ve caught myself a few times, looking in the mirror after waking up, growing “Ugly”. That certainly was not going to inspire me to be thankful and expectant of good things! for my day I’m being transparent here because I know many of you reading this are unaware or forgetful about the words you speak aloud. It is time for us to understand Life and Death indeed are in the power of our own tongue and we absolutely must take control of our words because it’s dead certain that they do affect our life, atmosphere and future.

I’ve no trouble receiving the truth, that my identity is in Christ, but my problem is rashly blurting out whatever negative feelings or condition of my painful or uncomfortable symptoms are at the moment. It is one thing to think good thoughts.. It is quite another to declare with hope with expectancy!

This won;t be a long blog. The antidote is simple choose to speak life. Choose to speak goodness, healing, joy and expectancy. (yes, I know..not easy, but no good new positive habit is easy). If you have a bad memory or are so programmed to speak negativity because of very long seasons of suffering and hardship, ask God to remind you. Post notes all over your house to remind you to speak out God’s promises and hope for you. Ask God to help you find one or two people who you can agree with each time you re weak, depressed and frustrated.

Cancer is not your death sentence. Dystonia, MS, Mold Illness, Mercury poisoning, Fibromyalgia, fatigue, ADHD is not your identity. Remember, you are BLESSED! You can do it You are God’s Treasure. His thoughts toward you are so innumerable, and full of liquid love. You are beautiful, a hand-made one of a kind design! You are getting better and your painful symptoms are diminishing. You will FLY with wings as eagles. Jesus will never leave nor forsake you.

If you are lost, broken, suffering, Jesus waits for you to invite Him to be the Lord and Savior of your life..and your best friend! Declare this prayer of Salvation:

Heavenly Father, I come to you, asking for help. You sent your only precious Son to save and deliver me from my sin and brokenness. I ask you to forgive my sins and everything wrong I’ve ever done. Jesus, I ask you to be the lord and Savior of my life and I surrender all to you. Thank you, Father for giving me your son, Jesus Christ, Yashuah, the messiah! in Jesus name, I ask and thank you, amen.

Now get baptized, start reading the Gospels, praying and communicating honestly with your Heavenly Father, Jesus and Holy Sprite. Seek a full Gospel church. Stay committed and share your testimony of salvation and your new life and what JESUS did for you! Shalom beloved!

Joy in the journey.  I'd always hoped that the road would gently unwind before me as i struggled to ascend to higher heights, while being pushed backwards, by the  continual and daunting symptoms of my many ailments. Just last week, as I was uploading my original songs and past gigs, to this website, i remembered  the anguish and  exhaustion   of supporting myself by delivering telephone books during the  day and  most evenings, I would be performing at the Oakland House, a private  event or a local tavern. My love for composing on the guitar and collaborating on original music with  John DeGrazio and Kyle Hicks saved me from suicidal  thoughts. God always made a way for me to  get fund to produce and record my songs in the studio.  I'll never forget  crying out  to God as I pushed a hand truck loaded with heavy telephone books, wondering why I wasn't touring with my band and respected.   The staggering fatigue from the  Lyme symptoms and  my carbon monoxide poisoning episode made me feel inferior and cursed,  The constant eking out a living wore down my spirits often and i wondered what my destiny was. 

      Angst, disappointment and regret, weighed me down often during my long Dystonia battle. but as I've finally come of age this late in my life, I acquiesce to the reality of Christ being my solid foundation. God's precepts have sheltered me from the sting of hatred, unforgiveness and retaliation. I know that His peace tempers me to have a grateful heart and make the most of every opportunity, however small.  I cherish, Moses' Psalm 90:12.

       Teach us to number our days that we may know wisdom.   

      No need to keep asking  Father God..."why"

       In the past, I often felt ,my creative and musical endeavors were not allowed to bear  the fruit they deserved for whatever reason. i wanted to be successful fashion designer, best selling author, renowned poet or well-loved music icon. too often, my creations had to be postponed indefinitely because of   constant interruptions of lie-threatening illnesses.. Worse yet, fewer and fewer invitations came as people became aware that the TMJ Dystonia symptoms  were diminishing my . I noticed with great anxiety, that my vocal prowess and guitar skill was also strained.  I'd expected  that I'd  get better with age, not worse.

       And so,, I determined in my heart, I would push forward no matter how much it hurt. I could not quit because of what Christ did for me. He destined me to be a conqueror and i was to  be a role model for precious  girls and women whose lives were shattered by trauma. As I scan  the horizon of my future, I'm assured that  He will bring beauty out of the ashes.  Behold, He arose  and redeemed me! 

Some images ©

Powered by Bandzoogle